I see in Christian circles a good deal of talk about empathy these days, and in that discussion, I think I perceive a wide movement that’s conflating excusing with forgiving. Here’s what I mean:
Jesus says this about forgiveness in one of his parables:
32 “Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. 33 Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ 34 In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.
Matthew 18:32-35
35 “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”
He says “…unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart…”. But much (not all, mind you, but much) of what I’m hearing today seems to have a flavor more like this: “…unless you realize in your heart that the one who sinned against you is going through something...” Or, “…unless you realize that they’ve had a hard life and need some grace.”
And the result that I see quite often seems to be that those who think this way end up making excuses for people, even being afraid to call sin sin.
And that’s where things start getting pretty twisted to me, because it seems like we’re running interference for the Truth of how things are, all in the name of empathy or of grace.
The fact of the matter is that we all have our struggles, and we have all been hurt by life. Yet we all are expected, says Jesus, to follow the Golden Rule, are we not? And if not, where is it written that there is an exception? Isn’t this the example he set—having been mistreated so much, and still telling the truth while constraining himself from immediately calling down fire from Heaven on the people who opposed him?
And this Jesus, who evaded the temptation to make excuses i his own life was not apt to excuse others. Witness how this parable treats the excuses made by some of the characters in it:
16 Jesus replied: “A certain man was preparing a great banquet and invited many guests. 17 At the time of the banquet he sent his servant to tell those who had been invited, ‘Come, for everything is now ready.’
Luke 14:16-24. NIV.
18 “But they all alike began to make excuses. The first said, ‘I have just bought a field, and I must go and see it. Please excuse me.’
19 “Another said, ‘I have just bought five yoke of oxen, and I’m on my way to try them out. Please excuse me.’
20 “Still another said, ‘I just got married, so I can’t come.’
21 “The servant came back and reported this to his master. Then the owner of the house became angry and ordered his servant, ‘Go out quickly into the streets and alleys of the town and bring in the poor, the crippled, the blind and the lame.’
22 “‘Sir,’ the servant said, ‘what you ordered has been done, but there is still room.’
23 “Then the master told his servant, ‘Go out to the roads and country lanes and compel them to come in, so that my house will be full. 24 I tell you, not one of those who were invited will get a taste of my banquet.’”
This is not the Jesus of modern sensibilities that so many in the churches today want us to believe in. He was not here displaying empathy for the life situations of these people—or at least not in this modern sense. No, he expected them to come as invited, and took their excuses angrily, as insults. But so many today would have us believe that the proper way to tell this story would be to say:
“Then the owner of the house became empathetic and ordered his servant, ‘Go out quickly to all those invited, and tell them that I empathize with them, and that they have my blessings to prioritize their lives thus.'”
Jack’s Made-Up Version
The real Jesus thinks that all humans are obligated to repent and to adopt his mindset over their own. When they don’t, he gets upset with them.
I’m not saying that empathy is a bad thing, but if it’s twisted into giving people a pass where Jesus holds them accountable, this is not good. Indeed, the definition of empathy is probably just as twisted by moderns who want it to be an excuse instead, as are other words. Here’s a screenshot of three definitions for empathy:
If you actually study all this out—though I won’t take the time to do that here—you’ll see that Jesus definitely exercises definitions #1 and #3 frequently.
Forgiveness
So, when we are considering someone’s bad behavior, we still are commanded to forgive those who ask forgiveness—and to do it actually “from the heart”, which seems to be as opposed to something more superficial, as in “from the mouth“, for example. But never do I see Jesus excusing anyone’s sin, as so many do today—as if they simply “couldn’t help it”.
No, the real Jesus looks at our suffering and tells us not to give up. He doesn’t excuse the giving up, but commands us not to. And he himself makes no excuses for the suffering they are expected to endure—which observation will have many anxious to move on without considering it, for it’s a very troubling idea to them.
Look what he told those about to suffer some serious tribulation:
Do not be afraid of what you are about to suffer. I tell you, the devil will put some of you in prison to test you, and you will suffer persecution for ten days. Be faithful, even to the point of death, and I will give you life as your victor’s crown.
Jesus. Revelation 2:10. NIV
This is quite far from telling them that it’s OK to compromise on their righteousness and faith if they’re going through a hard time. And there are several other examples of this kind of stick-to-it thinking from Jesus in the scriptures. But many, it seems, don’t want to see it, and would rather engage their imagination to impute to Jesus this modern sensibility of “empathy” while ignoring his actual words and his actual outlook on such things.
And I don’t think it’s a coincidence that in their soteriology, they believe that God imputes to them the righteousness of a Jesus that they themselves will not be faithful to death to emulate. I think it’s a cheat.
That is to say, I think they make up that doctrine so as to give themselves a break. And if makes them feel better about their un-repented sins—just as it makes them feel better to step in between God’s judgment and the sins of others that God condemns.
But tell me: When do we ever see the apostles of Jesus standing in between him and the religious hypocrites he condemned so strongly?
Perhaps something of this kind of interfering “empathy” was going on here, after Jesus had just sternly rebuked some Pharisees in front of the crowd, but not excuse is made for them:
12 Then the disciples came to him and asked, “Do you know that the Pharisees were offended when they heard this?”
Matthew 15:12-14. NIV
13 He replied, “Every plant that my heavenly Father has not planted will be pulled up by the roots. 14 Leave them; they are blind guides. If the blind lead the blind, both will fall into a pit.”
If the real Jesus had shared the sensibilities of this modern version of Jesus that some seem to have bought into, wouldn’t he have made excuses for the Pharisees here, rather than to say they were “blind” and headed for the “pit”? But many who would condemn a modern-day Christian for saying such things will not condemn Jesus for it. Instead, they’ll pretend to honor Jesus, but will disallow others from adopting Jesus’ same attitude about such bad behaviors as Jesus was calling out here.
The Big Surprise
I think that the real Jesus would surprise a great many people who consider themselves his followers today. I do not think they are really listening to what he says, but have swapped it out with other things, as if he wouldn’t notice.
But the real Jesus says things like this:
If I had not come and spoken to them, they would not be guilty of sin; but now they have no excuse for their sin.
Jesus. John 15:22. NIV
In the following passage, note what Paul wrote about excuses:
For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse.
Paul. Romans 1:20
And again in Romans 2:
You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things.
Paul. Romans 2:1. NIV
No, the gospel preached by Paul, an authorized apostle of Jesus was one in which everyone was expected to repent, no matter how hard a life he or she has, or what he or she is “dealing with”, as we moderns would put it:
In the past God overlooked such ignorance, but now he commands all people everywhere to repent.
Paul. Romans 17:30. NIV
There were no exceptions then. So why is there such a movement today to make exceptions for people whose lives are hard today? Have we somehow found ourselves another gospel?
