The Tool That Does Everything

The tool that does everything
Will not fit into one’s pocket.

It’s the lighter
With the fold-out fire extinguisher.

It’s the pen
With the fold-out desk.

It is the Swiss Army Knife
With a fold-out submarine.


*In the interests of full disclosure, I should say that I think I may have heard some comedian mention a Swiss Army Knife with a “fold-out jeep” (some years ago), but having just now searched for any record of that, and come up empty, I have to consider the possibility that I came up with the idea myself. The world may never know. But until then, this is my credit to that anonymous comedian—or to myself, if I am in fact the source of it.


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