Come, And We Shall Bark

Come, and we shall bark at the man
Who approaches on our sidewalk.
We will snarl and bark
And put our feet up on the fence,
Pretending that we could not
Clear the fence if we wanted—
For we shall be kind enough
Not to terrify him too badly.

And we will tell him this is our yard and not his,
And that he’s walking on our sidewalk—
Which we deliberately keep outside our fence
As a courtesy to protect wanders like him
From our deadliness.

And we, noble fellow, do well to stand our post,
For if we didn’t, surely this man would
Kill our family, rob the house,
And probably burn it down
And eat our dog food—
Just as we can perceive that
His sinister intention has been
On every day he has walked by here.

So come, Sir Knight, and we shall bark as ever,
For having saved our domain from him thus far,
We shall by no means let him pass unwarned today.


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